Mission Connexion 2013

I attended Mission Connexion for the first time on Saturday, and was instantly impressed by . . . the biggest crowd I've ever been a part of!  Taking part in worship along with such a multitude was like a little taste of heaven, as well as making me feel rather small.  But aside from that, I came away from that long day with a few valuable thoughts . . .

1. Listen!

It seemed I heard this word in every session and workshop, and it became clear to me that listening well takes a lot of work.  To listen to other people without interrupting with my thoughts, my advice, my story, to listen to God without being distracted by my ideas, my interpretations, my plans -- it's hard!  I need practice to just shut up and pay close attention in order to learn from what I hear.  Along with that . . .

2. Be Humble

In one small group I was a part of, I happened to be the only one with personal experience pertaining to the subject at hand, and I ended up dominating the conversation -- a rarity for me!  I had plenty of applicable stories, illustrations, and knowledge to share, but I realized that I felt somehow above my fellows, as if my superior learning was my own doing.  That was a shocker, but a good reminder -- all of the circumstances that make up my unique experience were orchestrated by God.  I have to be careful that even bragging on Him is truly meant for His glory!

3. Joy Motivates

One of the keynote speakers shared very inspiring stories of how God used her through intense inner and outer conflict, and what struck me most about her was her radiant joy, even when speaking of her crushing loss.  In a conversation later, I was reminded that ultimately, our motive for everything we do is that we believe it will bring us joy, either now or in the future.  Even Jesus had this motive (Hebrews 12:2).  The Christian life may be difficult, missions may cost us everything, but the joy to come will be worth it all!

I wasn't expecting to come away with these thoughts -- in fact, I hadn't predetermined what I wanted to learn at all.  (It sounds silly, and maybe I'm the only one, but I do it sometimes.)  I think that when we're willing to learn whatever God has to teach us, we pay more attention to His little reminders.  I'm listening!

Missing Out

Back to the subject of beauty, I am a committed lover of the sort found in forests, particularly coastal mountain forests (think Drift Creek Camp).  I've been pining for a good solo "Narrows" hike, or something along those lines. But being denied such luxury, I've found myself . . . discontent.  I tell myself I have every right to wish for it, I never get good alone time with God, etc.  But I think that while my mind was up in the hills where I wasn't, I missed out on the beauty close to home (remember that transformational frost?).

Perhaps "good alone time with God" doesn't just go with the territory of a glorious location, for all its benefits.  To put myself there would not guarantee thrilling fellowship, and I know full well my true desire can be perfectly met in the barnyard, or a dilapidated car, for that matter.  I limit God by equating Him with my greatest experiences of Him.  Yes, I do believe in holy ground, and yes, God speaks through His creation in unique and magnificent ways, but it is only one of the ways that He speaks.  He is not confined to any place, thank God!  And He is greater than the very best that I know of Him.  To expect Him to meet even my loftiest standard is missing out!

Beautiful moments with my Creator will come again, but it is not for me to decide when and where.  If He takes me to a coastal mountain forest to be alone with Him, I'm all for that, but if not, I must look for Him to meet me in all His beauty . . . right where I am.

O God, You are more awesome

than Your holy places . . .

Blessed be God!

Psalm 68:35

I . . . But You!

I am quiet.

My soul is lonely.

I feel invisible.

I fear the bold and confident ones.

I see my selfishness.

I understand so little, perhaps nothing.

I hear voices I love, yet none seeks me.

Would I be missed?

But You, You are so patient with me.

You are never far away.

You see me better than I ever will.

You are personal and caring.

You gave Yourself for me.

You understand all perfectly.

You hear voices You love, yet none seeks You.

Oh, Father, I need You desperately!

May truth prevail!

(Written September 15, 2012)

I'm Healthy Today!

There’s been a stomach bug going around these parts lately.  I hoped I would avoid it . . . but not quite.  I was blessed with a very mild case, hardly worth mention, but it got me thinking about how thankful I am that even that little annoying pain isn’t part of my daily life.  Sickness, after all, isn’t some added thing, but the absence of health in some form.  Few of us wake up every morning and think, “Praise the Lord!  I’m healthy today!”  We’re so used to it, we don’t even notice until it is taken away, and then we complain.  But perhaps we should look at it from another angle and be thankful for the health we do have so much of.

Health, like all other good things in life, is a grace of God.  We don’t deserve it – in fact, it would serve us right if we were sick all the time, considering the flippant way we so often treat our bodies.  But day after day, most of us wake up in good health, and day after day, we take it for granted.  This goes for most of the good things in life, the graces of God that we enjoy.  How often do we thank God for the air we breathe?  Hold your breath for a couple minutes, and suddenly that invisible stuff is precious!  Sleep under the stars – right now, in January – and your house, however shabby and cluttered, will seem a most beloved shelter.  Try fasting a day or two and see how much more you appreciate being able to eat every day.  Go without water, too . . . isn’t the stuff pouring out of the faucet at your slightest effort beautiful?

The list could go on and on – stay up all night, go barefoot, live through a power outage, walk a few miles, chop a tree down or dig a hole by hand.  Not only are our needs abundantly provided for, but we have many things to make life so easy that we hardly think about what it would be like without them.  And what about people?  The response to the loss of (admittedly annoying) family members is so often, “I wish I’d appreciated them more, spent more time with them, etc.”  Only when a grace is taken from us, be it a relationship, electricity, running water, or health, do we see it for what it is.  Perhaps God sometimes temporarily withdraws a blessing to remind us that we need Him, and inspire us to give Him praise for it.  And sometimes, He may not give it back.  So let’s be thankful now for all God’s undeserved goodness so richly lavished on us!

Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers.

Every good and perfect gift is from above . . .

James 1:16-17

Beauty

The last few days have been clear and cold, which can provoke a number of responses.  On one hand, sub-freezing temperatures are a pain.  Pipes and hoses freeze, hence, water must be hauled for the animals, hands ache and then go numb, and people hit black ice and drive through fences.  But there's definitely a bright side -- literally.

I can't think of anything that can transform a landscape quite like a heavy frost.  Every humble dead leaf and common mud puddle suddenly becomes a shimmering work of art.  This is what I've been noticing with this cold snap, and it's glorious!  As I do chores around 8:10 a.m., I get to witness the few short minutes of "the golden hour" of sunrise, when the angle is just right to make the whole scene glow and sparkle with an unmatched radiance.  Words can't describe it, film can't do it justice, but I long to share it, because in these moments, I feel, "This is what I was made for."

This is what we were made for.  Our world was intended to reflect the beauty of its Creator, and if we look close enough, beauty is truly found everywhere in nature.  But some moments, some corners of this earth are unquestionably more beautiful than others.  They are the ones that remind us of the world we created for, and keep us seeking to know our beautiful God more and more.  Thank God for frost, icy puddles, stunning sunrises, towering trees, mountaintop views, coastal forests, upward trails, deer ferns, clear rivers . . . and the home He's preparing for us that all these are only a peek at!

"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world."  ~C. S. Lewis

2012: The Year of Peace

For the past several years, I've attempted to define God's work in my life over the year with one word. It's been words like love, joy, service, and encouragement . . . this year it's clearly peace. As one of my dear girls at a Good News Club I teach once observed, "Peace is a part of joy." (Sometimes 7-year-olds can be quite profound!) I've certainly found that simple statement to be very true this year. Even though I've gone through some rough waters, I've come to understand God's peace more than I ever did before. Only when I realize that He is the only one I can fully depend on can I run to His arms for rest. And nothing brings joy like resting peacefully in Him!

And oh, I'm running to Your arms, I'm running to Your arms

The riches of Your love will always be enough

Nothing compares to Your embrace

Light of the world, forever reign!

Peace is impossible without complete trust in Jesus, the One who made peace through the blood of His cross (Colossians 1:20). He loved us enough to give His own perfect life to reconcile our souls to God, but He didn't stop there. All we need and more is provided freely for us -- what greater peace than to rest in the arms of a loving heavenly Father who knows what is best for His children? I could go on and on, but as always, God's precious Word says it best . . .

You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You,

because he trusts in You.

Isaiah 26:3

Amen, and may God richly bless the new year!

Jesus Has Overcome!

"These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace.

In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer,

I have overcome the world."

John 16:33

It's Christmas.  Theoretically, the happiest day of the year.  Honestly, I've had happier days.  But the truth is, it doesn't really matter.  About two thousand years ago, God made a radical move -- He sent His Son, the Creator of all that is, to enter the world as a helpless baby, totally dependent on an ordinary teenage girl.  But He was to become not only Creator, but Overcomer of the world He made.  That infant would live through all the trials of humanity, and yet never once fail.  I can't even handle one trial without a mess!  He has every reason to write me off as hopeless, and without Him I am.  But He didn't.  Instead, He offers me His perfection in place of my sad efforts.  He has overcome for me!  Thank You, Jesus, for Your indescribable gift!

Confidence

Recently, when I think of my life, the word “confidence” comes to mind. Webster’s Dictionary defines it as “the state of feeling sure; assurance; boldness.” What am I sure of, you ask? The answer is in a verse that has repeatedly come to my attention in the past couple weeks:

“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God,

to those who are the called according to His purpose.”

Romans 8:28

We’ve heard it before, many times – just about every Christian has it memorized. But if we really believe it, it ought to produce complete assurance, reckless boldness! God is perfectly good, absolutely faithful, and totally in control. We should welcome trials just to see what God will do through them. It should be exciting to walk by faith!

I've seen God use my mistakes and struggles time and time again to grow me closer to Him, but only when I stop trying to do it on my own can I see that He knew exactly what He was doing all along. The key to seeing things work together for good is to love God and depend on Him – not wallow in self-focused misery over my failures, but go to my loving Father for help, expecting Him to act. And the more I see Him work, the more confident I become that He will work again, and again, and again . . .

Why I Write

So, why did I start a blog?  I'm not on Facebook, I can barely keep up with e-mails, I don't have texting on "my" phone . . . in short, I'm a bit behind the times.  But a few people have unknowingly encouraged me time and time again with their blogs, so I admittedly do benefit from some form of social media.  I decided it was time for me to contribute!

Having just started a new year of life, it seemed the perfect time to start a new aspect of life.  I'm not one of those who announces to the world everything I do, so the existence of this blog may be revealed rather slowly.  But my hope is that it will be a source of encouragement and challenge to all who will read my thoughts.

I wouldn't call myself a good writer -- it doesn't exactly come easy for me.  But strangely, I'm rather a compulsive writer -- I journal every day, write notes to everyone I know, and compose random theological essays (which will henceforth appear here).  I scribble in books.  I keep Post-its in my purse.  And now I blog.

I don't know quite how I became such an incessant writer . . . maybe I just like the feel of the pencil in my hand, or the muscle memory of typing.  A blank sheet of paper, actual or virtual, inspires me.  I write because I like to think.  Unlike the fine art of talking, I am free to take my time and take anything back if I need to.  No one else hears it until I'm completely satisfied with what I'm saying.  Ask my family -- I can't stand anyone looking over my shoulder at a work in progress!

I write to understand myself, to let out a little of my mysteriousness.  I write because writing lasts.  My notes will be there for people when I'm not, and as people discover my writings, they will discover something of me.  I write because God is a Writer, and I am made in His image.  There is perhaps no greater gift that I could give to those I love than a bit of my heart written out.  God has given us this very gift -- His heart in Book form.  Do we treasure it for what it is?

I rejoice at Your word as one who finds great treasure!

Psalm 119:162

Humble Heart

Lord, give me a humble heart.  May I always see my dependence on You.  May I have abundant joy in seeing You work through me.  Keep my eyes always on You, and You alone.  Your presence is all I need, You are all I have and all I have is Yours.  Keep me at rest in Your faithfulness.  Thank You for being perfectly in control.  All glory be Yours -- Amen!