2019: The Year of Imperfection

My past words to sum up each year of my life have always been positive. It seems strange to use a disappointing word like "imperfection" to describe what God has taught me in this past year of my existence, yet it is deeply fitting and strangely satisfying. This year has been paradoxically full of both difficulty and rich growth, and through it I have come to see imperfection as a truly beautiful word.

I have always been a major perfectionist. I believe in making things the very best they can be, and refuse to be satisfied with less than excellence. I want to fix things, set things in order, establish consistency and control . . . all while living in a frustratingly imperfect world. No matter what I do, life is never exactly what I wish it to be. And this year, I've had to face that fact more honestly than ever before. I've had to admit weakness and failure, let go of ideals and securities, and learn to embrace the truth that this world, with everything and everyone in it, is imperfect. For now. Perfection is coming, and above all, my desire for the Lord's return and restoration has deepened as I acknowledge the current struggles.

Embracing imperfection is painful, yet freeing. As long as I keep trying to make my world perfect by my own wisdom and effort, I will keep running into frustration and despair. And by pretending that imperfection doesn't affect me, I am only lying to myself. Illness, grief, loss, and weakness are real. I can't change that. But in shining contrast is the Lord's perfect strength and sovereignty over all imperfections I could ever encounter. The beauty of this present imperfection is that it drives us to the feet of the only Perfect One, who has promised to come again and make all things new.

Come quickly, Lord Jesus!

The Waters of Life

Today, I watched my brother take the step of baptism as a testimony of his faith, the public declaration Jesus called all of His followers to make. Baptism was common as a purification rite long before Jesus ordained it for believers, but it took on a special significance as a symbol of participation in His death and resurrection. Water cleanses the body as the blood of Christ cleanses the soul, and above all, water represents life. Our bodies are largely made of water, and without it, we die. A well-watered land is rich and green, but drought will turn it into a barren wasteland. Water is precious, absolutely essential for every aspect of life. And the Living Water, the Lord Himself, must come to make our desert souls flourish and blossom into beauty that is dead without Him. Not only does this means of life benefit us, but it makes us into conduits to channel the blessing of life to others. What a blessing it is indeed to be washed clean and made vessels of Living Water!

"He who believes in Me, as the scripture has said,

out of his heart will flow rivers of living water."

John 7:38

Pride or Prayer

Oh, how easy it is to see the shortcomings of others! Their glaring faults are so easily identifiable, especially when we are innocent of the same sins. When a whole crowd of one's acquaintances appear to be running with the world, it can be hard to stand out . . . and rather dangerous if we're not careful. From the vantage point of what feels like a solitary journey on the highway of righteousness, we may begin to look down on those below instead of up to the heights we ourselves have yet to reach. And that is where we will trip up and land right among the very people we so smugly looked down upon.

Jesus strictly condemns a judgmental attitude, because it is nothing less than hideous pride, putting others down to elevate our own merits. If we really judged by His standards, we would see that we are no better than those we are tempted to criticize. Should we then excuse the sin we see in others, since we are all guilty? Certainly not, but the humble approach is rather to pity the sinner and desire his growth. The best way to lift up a stumbling brother is not to lecture him from the soapbox of our own shaky accomplishments, but bring him before the Father on our knees.

"It is possible to move men, through God, by prayer alone," says Hudson Taylor. If you find yourself looking down your nose at others, the first person you need to move is yourself -- and you will make no progress in humility by exerting more of your own willpower! Humble yourself in confession before God first of all, and He will give you the compassion to pray for others' growth. He has the power to convict and change hearts, and the most effective part you can play is prayer. If you speak out, pray first. If you keep silent, pray anyway. Pray always, and leave the judging to God.